Lagniappe Literature

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maryeve
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The Lost Heiress (Ladies of the Manor)
Roseanna M. White
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Fifty Shades of Grey

Fifty Shades of Grey  - E.L. James Recently, with ALL of the attention that this book series has garnished, I felt I HAD to read FIFTY SHADES OF GREY. Yes! I finally succumbed to the peer pressure and joined the ever-growing waiting list at the library for the entire book series. After waiting several weeks for the library to call with the great news that my name had finally been reached on the list, I threw on my tennis shoes and ran right on over to the library to pick up my little piece of literary gold. (True story, as I live dangerously close to the library. Spend way too much time there.) FINALLY....I could join the rest of the world and dream about the charming Christian Grey.
Seriously, I am having a VERY difficult time getting involved in this story. PLEASE, please forgive me FIFTY SHADES fans!! I am not taking a jab at anyone personally, I'm just struggling with the story line. Normally, if I enjoy a book, I am done in 3 days. TOPS. I began FIFTY SHADES of GREY on the 26th of Feb. and I've just reached the fifth chapter. Let me just say that I do not have one specific genre that I read. I read whatever happens to appeal to me. So....it's not like I'm reading something entirely outside of my "likes". I just find what I've read so far a tab bit unbelievable. I know. I know. Just fiction, right? But...I like my fiction with a little "believe ability". Would this powerful, sexy man find Anastasia one bit attractive in real life? Uh..no!! Ana is a total goofball. She doesn't have an interesting bone in her body. Am I to believe that Mr. Incredible drives 165 miles to a rural college town to see this plain Jane? Maybe I have to give it more time. Obviously. Like I said, I'm only on page 65. However, when I've reached the fifth chapter of any prior book, I usually know if I'm going to like/love/hate what I'm reading. Hmmm...perhaps I will have better things to say with my next review. I hope I eat my words. I really WANT to love this book. Besides, my name is on the waiting list for FIFTY SHADES DARKER and FIFTY SHADES FREED.

*Update edit*

Holy crap! Oh my!! My subconcious, my inner goddess and I have finally finished this book. My opinion has not changed. I still find this book lacking just about everything a great book should have. I think I failed to mention that I must have been one of the only women in the world who did not know what this story entailed. I only knew that every woman was talking about Fsog and when one would, I would stop them by holding my fingers in my ears and do the "lalala" thing. Therefore, I had probably been warned and just like clueless Miss Anastasia Steele, I plunged ahead with something that I shouldn't have. I'm going to make my latest review as quick as I can. First, where was the plot? There was a plot, right? Like Ana's resolve, plot=weak. And...while Mr. Grey did sound glorious to look at, he also sounded like a serious headcase who found it sexually fulfilling to abuse women. Eat this. Wear this. Go/don't go here. Talk/don't talk. The list of his cruel demands goes on. Did I find him sexy and charming? Uh..no! I found Christian to be a man I was very familiar with. My ex. By the way, I left that relationship running for the hills. Can you say STALKER? Secondly, as the storyline progressed I expected the characters to evolve, too. Ana remained as dumb and immature as she was from the moment she tripped her way into Grey's kinky world. Christian Grey. Why would his character evolve during the course of this poorly written novel? He brooded about when Ana suggested "more" so I just knew he wasn't going to change for me. However, I would like to add that I did come to realize why he found Ana, the virginal, boring, pitiful pint of "Vanilla" so fascinating. Grey discovered she was a virgin. What man wouldn't want to mold her into his love slave? Hello!! Ana is an absolute ditzoid when it comes to ANY knowledge of sex, vanilla OR 31 flavors. WTF? Has this girl never discussed the tiny details of sex that ALL girls discuss and giggle about with their close friends and roomate? She and Kate are supposed to be so close but they've never had these "girl talks"? Unrealistic, especially since Ana informs the reader that Kate doesn't take bull from men. Once Ana's sexual "situation" has been "remedied" by Fifty, Ana is all of a sudden a natural born porn star. Um...yea..no. Does the plot ever thicken? No to that, too. Ana and Grey's relationship consists of a bunch of goofy ass emails and even goofier phone calls: Ye ole, "you hang up. No! You hang up." And this man is a CEO. (Rolling my eyes and I don't care who sees me do it.) The sex? Wasn't even that exciting. Of course, Ana claims Christian is an expert lover. Compared to who...her? HOW does she know he is the "greatest"? Oh, yea. Beacause he is training and manipulating her to believe that he is the best lover, like, ever. (Again, rolling my eyes.) I (I'm entitled to my personal opinion)feel this book was so poorly written. So, there ya go. Like it or not, that's it. I'm done. Just one more thing,like Anastasia Steele, I just can't seem to learn my lessons. I feel the need to punish myself further because I am going to proceed onward with my relationship with Fifty. Turns out, I must enjoy torture, too.